“I am a drinker with writing problems.”
- Brendan Behan
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iamprincessash:

I don’t even care how this happened

iamprincessash:

I don’t even care how this happened

petergatsbygreen:

forevercryingbecausemerlin:

GROW DINOSAURS

We literally have an entire trilogy of movies that explain why that is a bad idea.

(Source: yfox)

distinguishedbaloney:

The game is rigged

distinguishedbaloney:

The game is rigged

102014

  • If people could stop having birthdays with ALL OF THE BIRTHDAY CAKE, that’d be great. I’m so fat. I have no self control.

  • Speaking of being impulsive, I’m afraid to check my bank account after this weekend.

  • Today is a nice day to curl up in a warm beard and read.

  • Bowie’s Halloween costume is gonna be SO ADORB!! I just hope he cooperates. If it’s not fun for him, it won’t be fun for me.

  • I hate getting calls at work. If I can hear you in your office dialing my phone number, you can probably just yell what you want…unless you’re asking to borrow tampons. 
What do you mean it’s only Tuesday??

What do you mean it’s only Tuesday??

Mondays.

Mondays.

BRUHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!   (at National Apple Harvest Festival)

BRUHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!! (at National Apple Harvest Festival)

(Source: bneezy)